Tiktok gave me three spoonsered/ad videos in a row for that fucking “oh a stripper made/recommended it” electric pussy shaver thing which is fucking hilarious to me. I can’t even sit down on a chair without a donut pillow for another month, what makes you think I want a shaver down there!
Like, girl, I just got mine 2 months ago! She needs her blanket for optimal healing!! Let her be warm she’s new here!!!
[image description: a screenshot of a comment from social media reading
“To everyone clutching pearls in the comments, I encourage you to spend time with this quote from Spencer Ackerman in an interview with Marisa Kabas re: Henry Kissinger’s passing. It hits the nail on the head: “I had a conversation with my daughter who was like, ‘Why are people excited? So are you happy that this guy died?’ And I was trying to talk about it in terms that I wanted her to take away from this. That it is a bad habit of the soul to celebrate anyone’s death. But that emerges from our understanding of our humanity, what we owe to one another, the basic respect and dignity in viewing human lives as precious and in viewing them as valuable. And that’s a contract. And there are gonna be some people, like Henry Kissinger, who break that contract at grand scale, and you don’t have to be sad when someone like that dies. You can feel relieved. You don’t want, in general, to be happy when people die. That is not a good way of being that will ultimately hurt you more than it will hurt them. But there are some people whose deaths come as a relief, and sometimes they come as a relief because justice was never served for the acts of such a person. And relief is the closest thing to justice that people will experience."”
Person of interest, not known to be the shooter. If captured, God willing he won’t be, we’re going to need full body mugshots. Nude of course, if he’s comfortable with that. If he’s not captured, he should flee to the safety of Cuba and start an OnlyFans.
Also there’s the matter of if this guy is in fact a fan of bicycling while armed (guns go off all the time for like no reason, clearly just an accidental discharge, he can’t control where someone else is standing when his gun goes off, case closed).
REACTION SPEED [Heroic: failure] - a single ravioli, damp from the water, still pleasantly steaming, lands with a defeated slap, on the linoleum floor. You see it happen, watch it flip through the air, like an Olympic bronze off the high-dive, or a suicidal veteran of war. you feel yourself shout a “No!”, but it is too late. there, the ravioli, impossibly, lays limp.
FORSAKEN RAVIOLI - Why, it thinks, why me? For all the time I was grown and processed then crafted and for all the time I have waited for the only purpose which I was made for. To be cast so suddenly, so errantly, into the realm of the beyond? Beyond savior.
DRAMA - And here you stand, clad like a captain with your wooden spoon, watching as an honorable soldier, nay, a man, lies without your hand to aid him, on the kitchen floor.
VOLITION - you must act, now! first it must be picked up, then its fate can be decided.
COMPOSURE - Its fate is the trash. AUTHORITY - Its fate is the trash.
YOU - You pick up the ravioli, it is hot, nearly still boiling, gushing steam and hot pasta blood down your hand. It hurts, but standing here, there is nowhere else for it.
PERCEPTION - It looks fine…
LOGIC - Don’t do this.
SHIVERS [Heroic: Success] - Somewhere southeast of here, perhaps hundreds of miles, grain sprouts in a field, rich wheat, and butternut squash, only an acre over. The wind whistles through the fields, running like gleeful children through the tiny, green plants. Some will be eaten by birds, worms, or moles, but some will reach high into the sky, where they will be plucked and ground into pasta dough. You have seen the birthplace of this soldier. It is humble, a beautiful childhood, and so, so long ago. An entire pasta-lifetime, now.
FORSAKEN RAVIOLI - I thought I had finally made it. And with my brethren…
YOU - You look at the bowl, the rest of the ravioli, steaming in mournful, pyrrhic celebration.
My company…
EMPATHY - This ravioli could be you. You can’t give up on it now. Not because of your own mistake.
AUTHORITY - This is not what a dignified man would do. send him off and mourn, perhaps, but do not spend one moment more considering his limp, cooling corpse.
DRAMA - Where has your heart gone, O Honorable One?
Authority - …
EMPATHY - the greatest service you could do for this little soldier, and for all those beyond you that forged him, is to eat him. What else is rightfully to be done?
VISUAL CALCULUS - It was on the floor for less than 4.7 whole seconds.
ENCYLOPEDIA - most forms of bacterium are able to jump, especially to wet materials, in about 1.2-
PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - any residue on your kitchen floor may well be material which was once already in your stomach.
CONCEPTUALIZATION - if you think about it, that means you’ve already kind of eaten the ravioli.
INLAND EMPIRE - From the Floor, Of the Floor, To the Floor. To be, or not to be, one with this eternal cycle?
ENDURANCE - Anything the floor could not contain, you could digest. (with VOLITION) We are iron.
HALF LIGHT - Bite into its soft, warm flesh.
EMPATHY - Give it peace.
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - Eat the floor-violi, pasta slut!
YOU - weeping, bring the ravioli to your lips, and then, impossibly, with infinite mercy, love, bring it into you. It tastes fantastic. You would have never know it was on the floor at all. You can feel the hum of satisfaction, the glory of it in your lungs, swelling to fill you more than even a pasta-feast could. This is the mercy you wish your God could cast on you, when you fall.
Dudes healthcare is so fake. My ADHD meds are $940 without insurance. But they gave me a website of “coupons” which straight up looks like a scam website, and I got it today for $60! Just a coupon from a random website and it was $900 cheaper. America, I am confusion!! America explain!!
For all my uninsured judys out there it’s for Walgreens only: walgreens.rxsense.com
as a pharmacy technician i can share with you some websites that give you those “coupons” for your meds!
goodrx is the most well known one, but if i’m trying to find the cheapest price for a patient i compare it to scriptcycle, and use whichever is offering the best price. you just type in the medication (PLEASE make sure you’re getting the right drug, dosage, and quantity) and your zip code and they will spit out some offers for you
some pharmacies may have their own discount card to compare to as well!
if you are getting a name brand medication, you can also look at the manufacturer’s website to see if they offer any evouchers for you to use too
good luck out there 👍
You can sometimes give cheaper prices on those than your insurance copay!
Your mother’s voice echoed up the stairs and into your partially open door. With a groan you sit up from the sunken shape of the bed and look out the window to your left. You could see the beat up silver sedan that your sister’s friend drove. You could see your sister saying goodbye into the open car door before slamming it closed and starting her short walk to the front door. You turned and pushed yourself up and out of bed. Stretching your back to the left until, Pop, your back cracks, relieving the tension. You brushed your hair out of your face and left your room. You turned and walked down the stairs slowly. Making sure you peaked out only after your parents were busy doting on your sister. They were busy rambling about how much they missed her and asking her everything about her college year. Reluctantly you stepped out from behind the corner and finished the last few stairs. (Content warning for some mild transphobia)
I need everyone to know that I looked it up, and Noah Lyles is doing this as part of an ongoing bet he has with shotput competitor Chase Jackson. She’s wearing Naruto accessories every day, and if Lyles whips out Yugioh cards at every race, then for the shotput finals Jackson will re-enact the scene of Rock Lee dropping his weights.
This is now the only part of the Olympics that I care about.
I am having the worst gay fever I’ve had in months, maybe years. My eyes are watering, I can’t stop sniffling, even the meds aren’t helping. Surely, I will soon perish.
oh god damn it. HAY. HAY fever.
stOP INVESTING IN THIS. 😭 let me make my gay little typos in PEACE…
as photomatt deletes everything, me and a few others are trying our best to compile screenshots to spread the word of the situation. most of the screenshots in the dropbox feature a comment by one of our helpers containing context. if you have any screenshots you’d like to add, please dm me. there is a high chance this account will get banned, so please save this dropbox and the screenshots included and continue to spread the word.
thank you!!
edit: thank you to all the people sharing and reblogging this! please note that this dropbox is being constantly updated (as i type this, files are being processed) so be sure to check in frequently for updates.
edit 2: as this gets more popular, i’m getting more and more worried about the probability of getting banned. to send me screenshots, please feel free to add me on discord (@mit_skies). i’ll try to keep everyone updated on there + it’ll be easier for me to see and document screenshots.
photomatt did in fact delete everything, so keep circulating the tapes
26th December 2024
Reblogged From socialistexan
Notes: 45
